Tuesday, 17 December 2013

The Worst Christmas Gift Guide EVER!!!

Tired of reading all those Christmas gift guides and recommendations? Well here's a guide with a twist! We've put together a list of the 10 worst gift ideas we could find! In the mood for a laugh?? Read on!!! 


WARNING - NOT SUITABLE FOR CHILDREN!!!!



There are hundreds of gift guides out every Christmas, which is all well and good, but it got me thinking, wouldn’t it be fun to compile a list of some of the worst gift ideas possible!  So here it is, my list of the 10 worst gift ideas around! 

WARNING – this post may not be safe to view at work, or for that matter even at home!  Viewer discretion advised!  Haha!!  Enjoy!

10.  Muscle Body Suit



That’s right!  No now you no longer need to workout to get the body you’ve always wanted!  Get your custom made lean body suit, throw a fitting shirt over it and then head down to the clubs and impress the ladies with your buff new physique!  


I guess if the ladies can change their faces with makeup we can change our bodies with body suits. 

Now both parties can get a nice shock waking next to unrecognizable people the next morning!

Check out the muscle suits here:



9.  Electric Nose Picker


Don’t be disgusting, stop picking your nose with your fingers!!! Start picking your nose with this awesome electric nose picker!  ‘Nuff said! Haha!


8.  Elephant Poo In A Box


For the nature lover and that friend who has ‘crap’ all over the place!  Real elephant dung in a box!  Who knows, maybe it will actually make some peoples places smell better! Haha!


7.  Lamb Skin Condoms


Errr…  Maybe some people get off on wearing animal skins, or perhaps your girlfriend told you she likes the taste of lamb?  Either way, this is gross! 

Get your own set here:


6.  Fake ATM Receipt


Hey guys, wanna impress that gold digging skank you saw at KPO your local bar, then just accidentally drop this ATM receipt as you pay for your next drink.  Be sure that it lands in a strategic position such that your person of interest is bound to see it.  Wait for her eyes to turn into dollar signs as she sees your ATM receipt for $314,159.26 and then make your move!  Have fun!

Get your own receipt here:


5.  Fart Filter



Do you have a stinky friend?  You know, the kind of guy that passes off as a biological weapon, capable of producing emissions that can take down the human race??  Well, then this is the ideal gift!  Disposable fart filters!  Your friend can finally come out of the bomb shelter and reintegrate into society!  Good times!

Get yours here:


4.  Home Body Bleaching



Some stuff is just so weird you really can’t make it up.  Touted as being the new equivalent to Brazilian waxing, Hollywood celebs and women all over the US are reportedly lining up to get their anuses bleached to look nicer for their hubbies.  Well, now you can do it yourself with this home anal bleaching kit or perhaps you know a friend who would like it:


The Japanese have taken things another step further with nipple lightening packs:




When will the madness end???

3.  Crib Dribbler



Tired of getting up all night to feed your baby, the solution is finally here – the Crib Dribbler!  Easy and safe, it has been specially made to meet all of your baby’s dietary needs.


Thankfully this thing is not real.  You get an empty box, but imagine the look on the face of that friend who’s just become a new parent!  Genius!  Simply place your real gift inside and watch the fun begin.

2.  Shit Box



For that friend who just doesn’t have enough toilets in their home or perhaps for yourself, so you don’t have to miss your favourite TV show in order to go to the toilet.  Just don’t forget to buy a healthy supply of air freshener too! Haha!!


1.  Face Slimmer



The Japanese have done it again!  No, this isn’t some kind of bondage device which allows you to poke stuff into your girlfriend's mouth (hey - stop thinking dodgy things), this is your key to getting a perfectly toned face and smile without having to go under the knife!  Just don’t let anyone catch you using it!



Get your own here:


Crazy stuff!!!

So there you go, some of the most ridiculous things we could find on the Internet.  How about you, have anything to add to our list of ridiculous gifts?

From everyone at Maximum Extreme, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!!

Stay tuned for our year-end big-fat-quiz-of-the-year podcast special!!!  It’s gonna be hilarious!

Laters people,

Bobby

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